Chapter 3 discusses the mental experiences some of the earlier astronauts had while in space. This was something that the scientists were curious about. In 1959, Eugene Brody believed "Separation from the earth with all of its unconscious symbolic significance for man,...might in theory at least be expected...to produce-even in a well-selected and trained pilot - something akin to the panic of schizophrenia.". NASA had no idea what would happen while their men were in space. Would they see the earth floating further and further away, and begin to feel lost? Would they become unresponsive and forget their mission? In 1957, over 100 airline pilots were interviewed, with a handful of them reporting having feelings of detachment from the earth. They reported feelings of euphoria, instead of fear. Many of them had the urge to fly continuing flying into the unknown.
NASA's fears were very real. During Ed White's space walk for Gemini IV, he became unresponsive for a time. And even after the captain ordered him back in, he continued staring out into space, trying to get better pictures of the abyss. The universe does dangerous things at this point. Had Ed stayed out longer, he would have risked his oxygen levels becoming dangerously low. Even if he only passed out, it could be the end for him. NASA had a policy - if a team member is stuck outside, you cut them free. It is not worth endangering more crew members to pull one back in. Can our minds comprehend the unknown? There is so much out there we cannot reach. The feeling of being away from earth - away from civilization, rules, gravity...It is a surreal experience that many cannot explain.
I cannot imagine being in a situation where I might have to cut a co-worker loose only to bring him to his death; his fate in my hands on order to preserve the mission. That is more responsibility than I would ever want to bear. The guilt involved in making this decision is cruel. How do you explain your decision to the family of the deceased and how do you go on about your everyday life having made that decision? The mental challenges astronauts are faced with are unbelievable. I had no idea until I read this book and I would imagine most people don’t know either.
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