Friday, February 13, 2015

The Determined Witch

Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone, written by J.K. Rowling, is a brilliant story about a young boy, Harry Potter, who has just gotten news that he is a wizard. On his exploration of magic, Harry acquaints two other young wizards: Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. As Ron, Hermione, and Harry’s adventure at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry develops, their friendship with each other strengthen. Hermione Granger in Harry Potter and the Sorcerer’s Stone exhibits incredible determination in everything she pursues, and this personality trait helps her acquire the necessary knowledge to become a great wizard. 
Posted by at

1 comment:

  1. UnknownFebruary 13, 2015 at 5:36 PM

    Not a bad opening paragraph, but it’s not perfect. To start off, ‘acquaints’ is a really awkward word. I know what you were trying to do, but it just doesn’t work. As I said, you paragraph is pretty good, but I think it needs a little more. You’re talking about how Harry meets Ron and Hermione and, through their adventures at Hogwarts, become closer and closer friends and then…HERMIONE GRANGER! There’s not lead up or transition to that. It’s just all of a suddenly, “This essay is going to be about Hermione.” I don’t know if I’m making sense…You may want to add a sentence or two leading up to your thesis that actually focuses on, exclusively, Hermione. With that, your introduction would be great! =D

    ReplyDelete

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)